It’s not that I don’t love you. It’s the sound I heard when I was 9 and my father slammed the front door so hard behind him I swear to god it shook the whole house. For the next 3 years I watched my mother break her teeth on vodka bottles. I think she stopped breathing when he left. I think part of her died. I think he took her heart with him when he walked out. Her chest is empty, just a shattered mess or cracked ribs and depression pills.

It’s not that I don’t love you. It’s all the blood in the sink. It’s the night that I spent 12 hours in the emergency room waiting to see if my sister was going to be okay, after the boy she loved, told her he didn’t love her anymore. It’s the crying, and the fluorescent lights, and white sneakers and pale faces and shaky breaths and blood. So much blood.

It’s not that I don’t love you. It’s the time that I had to stay up for two days straight with my best friend while she cried and shrieked and threw up on my bedroom floor because her boyfriend fucked his ex. I swear to god she still has tear streaks stained onto her cheeks. I think when you love someone, it never really goes away.

It’s not that I don’t love you. It’s the six weeks we had a substitute in English because our teacher was getting divorced and couldn’t handle getting out of bed. When she came back was smiling. But her hands shook so hard when she held her coffee, you could see that something was broken inside. And sometimes when things break, you can’t fix them. Nothing ever goes back to how it was. I got an A in English that year. I think her head was always spinning too hard to read any essays.

It’s not that I don’t love you. It’s that I do.


- It’s not that I don’t love you.  (via girlchoking)

(Source: extrasad, via wrxst)

cully67:

by far my favourite album cover
get-st0ked-then-t0ke:

http://www.tumblr.com/blog/get-st0ked-then-t0ke

http://www.tumblr.com/blog/get-st0ked-then-t0ke

http://www.tumblr.com/blog/get-st0ked-then-t0ke

http://www.tumblr.com/blog/get-st0ked-then-t0ke
ivies:

idk if I’ve ever posted this before but I found this on the stall wall in one of the bathrooms at my school.
"I wanted to help you you wanted me to kill you in the middle of the never we made love”
I wanna be your idea of perfect.
- Jay Gatsby (Leo)

(Source: cloclounique, via widdlefox)

pierce-effect:

this is beautiful because it could mean anything. its like they have left you to finish off the sentence for yourself. it could be “let her know right now that she’s beautiful, that you love her, that you cheated, that your have cancer or that you are depressed, but there is one definite meaning to this and its: let her know right now before its too late, before you hurt her even more (if its bad), before its the wrong time and she doesn’t feel the same way (if its an emotion). that is why this is my absolute favourite picture on tumblr 

breadmaakesyoufat:

815-oceanic:

do you ever look at your eyes in the mirror and be like “im looking at my eyes with my eyes”

I DONT NEED THIS SHIT RIGHT NOW.

(via lovesjustalyricinachildrensrhyme)

kaylanewell:

i passed this on my bike the other day and it made me feel better and now look here it is again